written 19 September 2023

I was just hit with such a wave of fucking indeterminate nostalgia and I just really need to write something down

read this and also this that was linked in it. They should be backed up in here

old things. they have stood after how much, how long, what have they seen?

do you know about the unwritten poem, the one about the stars painted over in landlord white? the

the

it might be cold in colorado, and i might want to shout that at the top of my lungs, something in me yearns to be reconstructed and reconstrued

it doesn't have to be colorado.

"Icarus is flying too close to the sun, and Icarus' life, it has only just begun" - Bastille. I need to yell I need to know everything will be alright and to know that it will happen soon and

this post is distressingly distressful. dw, there's just some unnamed yearning for saftey going on. everything will be alright. if you say that enough times you believe it. something something ap psychology. i think i knew it before from tumblr mental health posts :skull:

a tumblr poem? story? by @miseria-fortes-viros

yoooo guys these wings my dad made look INSANE i can't wait to try them tomorrow

i don't think you understand i totally thought we were gonna die locked up in this castle but this fucking genius was like "im going to invent a way for humans to fly". shout out to my dad he's a real one fr

LMAOOO this dude told me to be careful as he affixed the wings to my back...dad no offense but you just invented flying and we have to go high enough to avoid the king's archers. soo

HOOOOLY SHIT YOU GUYS I AM SO AFRAID. THE GROUND IS SO FAR. HOW DO BIRDS DO THIS. OH MY GODS OH MY GODS OH MY GODS

it's so beautiful up here

i don't like seeing the ground. i'm going higher

it's cold and i can't see anything. not sure if that's better or worse

by zeus...what is that thing...it's as bright as the sun and twice as warm

the gods look truly down on me this day...apollo calls to me from his chariot of fire. a mere mortal. he must think my flight such a wondrous feat

i don't understand why but he's coming closer. he is not supposed to stray from his path, lest the sun fall from the sky. why does he look so anguished to see me?

oh. i am in his path

it's so hot...was it this hard to fly before? maybe i'm tired

the wax

he really does look like the sun...the light emanates from his fingers, his hair, his skin. he means to catch me. i reach for him

his skin burns. i cannot hold on

i slip through his fingers.

it takes a really long time to fall from the sky. longer than i thought

i wonder if he cried for me

i pray to him just in case. i am grateful he tried. my palms are red and cracked from where they touched divinity. the ground does not look any closer than it was

i have not seen my father since we took flight...i hope he escaped. i hope he will not witness this. i wish i could tell him how joyful these wings made me before the wax melted

i do not regret it. i have seen with my own eyes what others will only dream of

i am not afraid

i am not afraid i am not afraid i am not afraid i am not afraid i am afraid i am afraid i am afraid

please please please please please pleaseplease

the gods will not save me. i suppose this is a lesson in hubris. i am forever a flightless thing

please please please i have no coin for the ferryman if i am to die now i will never reach the realm of hades please turn me into a bird any bird or a bug or something anything please please pleasepleaseplease

I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM N